Patient VS. Medic

So Being a medic I tend to try to treat myself without the lead of my doctors which I am discovering needs to stop. I have had diabetes for over 15 yrs and always felt like I know more about it then the specialist, and for the most part I do after living with it you tend to know these things but there are somethings I need help with. My doctor is amazing and anytime I go too see him we seem to get things done I can be completely open about pretty much anything. We share our faith and even things I go through in everyday life which I think helps him decide what is going to be the best treatment. He does not judge my diabetes care based of my numbers as we all know everything effects those numbers. Now I have for the most part kept my diabetes under control I have a little hurdle here and there with the highs and lows but it comes with the disease. I had a bad low blood sugar today it was 23 and I didn't even know it! lucky me my docs office is open till noon on sat. so I had to go in for the A kidney stone ( ouch ) and we tested my sugar when my CGM beeped low and amazing enough it was that low. I always keep juice in my purse and tabs of course but nothing seemed to get it up so of course to the ER he sent me by ambulance since driving was yeah not so much a good idea. so I sit here in the hospital over night to get the sugars under control as they treated the low it sent me sky high in the 400's. my doc meet us at the ER and took good care of me he let me take control with my pump and the CGM and testing he taught the nurses how to check the CGM if it beeps for a low or high while I am sleeping and how to suspend the pump if needed. he stayed with me for a while we watched T.V and after church tomorrow he will be back and will bring me a copy of the sermon since we go to the same church. He and my dad are great friends as they went to med school together he called him and they of course decide together what the treatment plan should be. I don't mind that since both have my best interest in mind. But today I felt like a failure I mean I am A medic and should have not let this happen but as my dad and doc told me hey you win some you lose some. I hate the fact that I will spend easter in the hospital I love the day as it is huge in my faith. I am very lucky to have the support I do as getting to hear the message in the hospital is better then missing it all together. I now know how it feels to be scared and restless in a hospital ( you can't get sleep in this place to save your life but I am on pain meds so they help but at the same time the constant beeping of the monitors and now helping the cause. the nurse was amazed that I do not wake up for BG checks but that is because my dad and mom would do it in the middle of the night when I was a kid. They brought up my lap top and thank goodness the hospital has wireless internet as I get to watch hulu.com great to catch up on shows!! and get on my fav sites too keep up with stuff. better then watching the small amount of channels on the T.V. The food stinks but the bed is kind of comfortable with the moving up and down thing. I got a private room thank goodness so all the people I get is the nurse my doc and the Endo. oh and my friends and family. even with this small bump in the road I still feel blessed to have the support and love of all. the low sugar was of course my fault as my pump was broke yesterday and so I had to use lantus and humalog shots till the new one arrived but I did not pay attention to the fact that I split the lantus dose half morning and half night so took the lantus this morning the pump arrived at like 11 am and I put it on with my basal going and everything so two basals equal a low just for the record. I just can't believe I made this bo bo. On the ambulance I always double check my work for my patients sake but failed to do it for myself. Well off to bed I go pain meds kicking in and I got to watch last weeks episode of house I missed. Happy Easter to all and God Bless. Enjoy the time spent with your family and friends and all the great food.